Purposeful Living

What does it mean and why does it matter?

I came across a LinkedIn post today about the recent horrific events pertaining to a young woman who recently lost her life at the hands of an alleged male murderer. This is the type of news that nobody wishes into existence.

However the tone of the post and subsequent comments left me even more concerned and alarmed. It was a full blown rant at men and signed off with “Men, do better”. The comments section was then a battle ground, where some seemingly well intentioned men were asking questions and being told to ‘educate themselves’.

I’m not here men or women bashing. This is the whole point. We must all ‘do better’.
Why do we live in a violent society? Because as a human race we have experienced horrendous amounts of violence and denigration – to both sexes. Think war, famine, conflict, the list goes on. Yes men are physically larger and stronger, and hence capable of harm to others. 

However if you give anybody a weapon they care capable of inflicting damage.

Just because you don’t have a knife in your hand on social media, doesn’t mean you’re not inflicting the same level of damage.

We must all ‘do better’.

Hence are you processing or projecting your unhealed trauma? Society is made up of individuals, whom each have the responsibility to do their share of the work. That includes doing their own trauma work.

You don’t have any I hear you say? If you’re a human living in a body then I hate to break the news to you, but that is utter BS. The entire human race is traumatised, it’s just that we are like a fish that doesn’t know what water is, because it’s something we are born into. We don’t know any different.

If we are not aware of our trauma (which isn’t the type that might historically be associated with ‘big T’ trauma) then the chances are we are projecting it out onto the world.

When we do this – we create more pain and suffering – for ourselves and those on the receiving end. Rather than take the opportunity to resolve the pattern and heal it, we perpetuate it and pass it down the generational line. Yes – think your children, family and anyone else you deal with day to day.

Trauma in essence is an unresolved experience. It is the response to a deeply distressing or disturbing event that overwhelms an individual’s ability to cope, which may result in feelings of helplessness, and reduce our ability to feel a full range of emotions and experiences.

Trauma and beliefs also go hand in hand. If you’ve had a negative experience with {insert x) then you will likely develop a belief about that situation / person and carry it around with you for the rest of your life – for better or worse.

When we carry it, we have a tendency to spill it out everywhere we go. The saying goes that ‘If you don’t heal what hurt you, you’ll bleed on the people who didn’t cut you’. This is why our focus must be directed at what we can do within ourselves, rather than creating more pain and division by our unconscious actions.

The continual drive and obsession for growth,  expansion and succeeding at all costs is literally killing women. The need to be permanently switched on and going at full speed is exhausting and unnecessary.  It is draining our life force away. Women are not designed this way, and our societies dominant masculine energy is the problem. 

No woman would purposefully design a modern world like this, yet we have been conditioned by it. We think it’s the norm, and because it doesn’t work for us – we believe that somehow WE are the ones who are flawed. It couldn’t be further from the truth.

The difference is this. Men have seasons throughout their life. Women have seasons every.single.month.

Until relatively recently this was an alien concept to me. For most or my life I have been disconnected from my month cycle.  Only now I am beginning to discover the changes that I experience within myself over the course of a month. If this is a new concept to you, you’re not alone. There’s a whole new world waiting to be discovered when you pay attention.  Cycles and rhythms play out internally – yet they are subtle. In order to know them you must pay attention.  Women for the most part have become numb to the life that is happening within their bodies. There is no space for feeling and emotions in the hyper masculine culture. It doesn’t exist. Which means, we don’t exist. Let that sink in. If a woman cannot be all of whom she is, do we really have a culture? No, we have a prison. And one I might add, of our own doing. This isn’t about blame, it’s about awareness.

So get this. Every month, the women in your life go through four seasons.

Spring.
Summer.
Autumn. 
Winter.

Every single month on repeat. The energy rises, the green shoots spark. The summer heat and beauty comes. The autumn leaves turn and then the cold wind sends us huddling under blankets for warmth and rest.

Every single month. Over and over. A constant change to our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual landscape. 

If you wonder why women are so complex, here’s why. If you’re a woman and you’re wondering why for the life of you, you can’t figure your shit out, here’s why. There’s nothing wrong with you. Chances are you’re just disconnected from what is. Your true nature.

We need to slow down. We need to stop. Smell the roses. Plait our hair. Dance and sing. Those are the things that make our spirit soar. You know when you’re in the company of a woman who is deeply connected to herself.  Her presence is enchanting.

This is what we deeply need to do our work. Space to be women. We are not men. We do NOT thrive in a hyper masculine environment.  

Likewise if you’re a man and you’re stuck in your hyper masculine with no connection to your feminine essence, you are guaranteed to burn out. Sooner or later life will crack you open and demand that you stop. I’d recommend making that decision before it’s forced upon you. Once you open  up to your emotions,  not only will you find true connection and fulfilment, you’ll also understand the female of the species a whole lot better.

We don’t want to be men. That’s your job. Please help us to create the space for us to do ours (and yes that might include crying,  that’s part of the role ;)).

Thanks in advance.

Remember, 

Breathe the change you wish to see in the world. 

Philippa xo

Reach out if you’d like to know more about my 1:1 offerings.

Beginners Breathwork – Claim the life that’s waiting for you!
26th March – 6pm UK time

There is no dress rehearsal.

Do you want to come to the end of it wishing you did things differently, took more risks and really went for it?

Or do you actually want to DO THAT. To actually claim and create the life you see inside of you?

The decision is yours!

But if you’re anything like 99% of the population you have – DOUBT, FEAR, UNCERTAINTY playing out in every moment, keeping you paralysed and procrastinating on what do to next.

Beliefs, conditioning and poor habits are likely keeping you stuck in negative loops where you just can’t seem to switch gears and start moving. Every time you begin you quickly become disheartened and fall into old ways of thinking and doing. This is what the fear mind does. It will keep you perpetually stuck.

So what’s the solution?

Breathwork.

Identifying and feeling through the emotional baggage holding you back will set you free. Release, release, release the old, outdated and worn programming keeping you stuck and master your emotional state for life!

Everything you want / need to change your destiny is WITHIN you already. It’s just a matter of accessing it.

This is what I’m going to share with you in this 2 hour workshop. Everything you need to know about breathwork to take into your day to day life to have massive shifts in your world – for the better! The things you long and dream of creating, They are possible. And they’re only a breath away.

Not only that but you’ll experience a deep dive guided session where we will release those pesky limiting beliefs and recode your subconscious mind with amazing positive stuff! It really is like magic and I can’t wait for you to experience it.

I haven’t done one of these workshops in a while and I was inspired by a friends recent post to support children in her local village in Africa (see below). I’ll be giving 50% of the proceeds of this session to provide school books etc so the children can continue their education via Lorna Matewere.

So not only will you be changing your life, you’ll be supporting others to change their lives too.  How cool is that?

Remember,
Breathe the change you wish to see in the world.

Philippa xo

​What are you waiting for?

Beginners Breathwork – Claim the life that’s waiting for you!
26th March – 6pm UK time

But is that really true?

What are you getting out of bed for every day? What are you doing with your time? What are you giving to and for?

Is it the money? If you’re really honest with yours IT IS ABOUT THE MONEY. And that’s not a bad thing. After all,  money provides basic necessities like food, shelter, and ultimately it gives you more freedom and choice.

But if it’s ALL about the money, then Houston, we have a problem. Because,  dear friend it means your heart is not in it. It never was and it never will be. So if it’s about the money,  be honest about it. Own it. Keep doing what you’re doing. Carry on…

If you’re reading this then the chances are you don’t care about the money but you’d like to. Because it would enable you to help more people and support yourself in the process. Again that is a good thing!

Lets get clear, money gives you options. It’s a resource. It is neutral so we give it the meaning we have identified in our heads. If you think rich people are assholes, guess what, money will be unattractive you and you’ll unconsciously sabotage your receiving of it. Our beliefs create our reality.

So if you don’t care about the money, what do you really care about? You should find a way of doing that, and make the money bit work for you  when you’re doing something good and giving from your heart, life will find a way to support you. That’s how it works 😉

You’re seeking a feeling. Safety. Security. Certainty. Peace. Empowerment. Freedom. All the money in the world won’t actually give you any of that. Only you can. And you can so starting right now. Then watch how everything else falls into place.

Remember,
Breathe the change you wish to see in the world. 

​Philippa xo 

It’s a great question and one I find incredibly difficult to answer. There are so many things I can do that it’s difficult to pin it down.

Speaking to a good friend today I asked her the question – she told me I listen and understand what’s not being said and help resolve what the underlying problem is.

So apparently I’m a listener. I’ve also been told a guide, support, mentor and magical being. All and none of these are true. Short story is that I am just me. All of me. And that gives you permission to be all of you.

The quirky, messy, ugly, loud, beautiful, expressive, joyful, loving, raw authentic emotional human being that you are when we strip it all back. Let’s be honest, we spend our whole life wearing a mask without realising that at any moment you can choose to take it off. It’s only when someone else does it that we become conscious that we’re even wearing one in the first place.

In that moment your world changes.

This is what I do. I help you uncover your true authentic self and bring it to the world. It looks different every time because humans are as unique as fingerprints. What the journey looks like for one person is likely to be wildly different from another.

I work with everything you can imagine (and probably more) including PTSD, anxiety, depression, physical illness, trauma, stress, burnout and any other mental and emotional flavour you can think of. Not just people with challenges to overcome, but also people who are thriving and want to go to the next level in their life.

I’m quiet about what I do because I hate marketing. But hey, if I don’t tell you what I’m offering, then I can’t actually support you. The irony!

If you’re interested to learn more there are a few ways to work with me currently.

STRONG SPIRIT – Breathwork Support Group & Membership
LIFE ALIGNMENT – 7 Sessions 1:1 to align all areas of your life
LIBERATION – 3 months 1:1 intensive

If you feel the call, I’d love to invite you into my magical world.

Remember,
Breathe the change you wish to see in the world.
Philippa xo

Life is not intentionally painful but instead you create the suffering for yourself. This is my morning reflection as I ponder why my days can feel heavy and laden with obligation, rather than uplifting and joyful. I love what I do, and yet this still happens. The feeling that I should ‘do’ something brings resistance with it, and that resistance in turn creates pain and discontent. 

As I write this a squirrel hops across the lawn, clearly enjoying himself! Happiness is a choice, peace is a choice. Our human minds are so caught in the miasma of trauma, tech overload and a culture that’s racing at a million miles an hour, we are unable to pause, take a breath, and see beneath it all that we have a choice. 

Slowing down is an art. Paying attention to self is also an art. In a society where your attention is captured and commoditised, we no longer know how to attend to ourselves and deeply pay attention. If we did, we would make changes. We would make different choices.

Living in each moment
Enjoyment and pleasure is always available in every moment. It’s just that we choose something else instead, and most likely have a ‘set point’ or base line that is something different. Fear, scarcity, anger, contraction are examples. When living this experience, it’s hard to imagine something different exists. Yet it does. We are living in the stories in our mind, and they keep us trapped. We replay over and over again in our bodies and energetic fields, the past, and projections of the future that may never come to bear. When we are fully in the present moment all of that fades away. We sink into the pleasure and enjoyment of life that naturally exists. The joy of a blooming flower, the comfort of a warm breeze on your skin. Why should it just be on ‘holiday’ a few times a year that we really get to enjoy life? It shouldn’t, the world is completely backwards.

One of the main reasons we don’t have the experience we desire is because we are resisting being in life. Fully in. Fully feeling everything that is happening in our experience and our body. We have become body phobic, worried that if we feel we might die. This is our resistance to life, to living, and to experiencing our true desires. In order to feel good, we must go through whatever exists in between us and that state. Often that’s the resolution of our pain and trauma, that is stored in our bodies, our thoughts, our energy field. The only way out is through. If you’re not where you want to be, it’s because you’re not prepared to open and fully surrender to what is required – to release and submit to the greater force of life that moves through your body – which will ultimately bring you to wholeness and peace. 

Breath is the number one tool that will help you cross the bridge EVERY SINGLE TIME. Your breath is a powerful prayer, one that can be directed to supporting you in releasing whatever no longer serves you, so you can connect deeply to yourself and to life. 

Allow yourself to feel
If you run scared of the sensations and feelings in your body, you will become a slave to them. They will keep you stuck, small and suffering, probably in silence. Emotions are not meant to be stuffed down. The energy and sensations that are moving in your body are supposed to do just that  – MOVE! When your mind creates a story about the situation, perhaps how it’s ‘bad’ or you’re ‘not allowed’ to express something such as anger for example – those energies turn inwards and create rigidity and blockages in your body. Life stops moving. You become stuck and stagnant. This causes pain and lack of enjoyment. Quite literally the juice is sucked out of life, everything is flat. We feel disconnected and dissatisfied, and nothing will fill that gap – not even our ‘go to’ addictions. 

When we go farther along this route we become numb, empty and depressed. Nothing lights us up, there is no hope. Life is happening but it feels like there’s a pane of glass separating us from it. We can’t connect. 

Breathwork offers an avenue to close this gap, to come back alive and connect once again with life. With purpose, joy, and excitement. The feelings you regularly experienced as a child before the outside world got its dirty hands on you. 

Remember those days? What did you love to do? What lit you up? What would you spend hours doing and never get bored? These are some clues, some breadcrumbs to follow to uncover your path for coming back to life. It’s never too late. Every day is a new day, one to start over if you desire. 

It all comes back to your willingness to be in the moment and to be IN life. This is not a dress rehearsal and you won’t get this unique moment back again. 

Take a deep breath.  Connect with your heart.  What will you do to come alive today?

Remember,

Breathe the change you wish to see in the world.

Philippa xo